Uuuuuuurg...

Coming back to this after a very long break. A much needed one I might say? Damn myself for doing things I shouldn't have done, and having emotions too much of a taboo for what should be right. I keep going from happy to depressive, to happy again etc etc. It's putting me in one of those heartbreak moods as a friend has told me, and it's alright I guess, but I don't like it right now. I haven't liked it for the past few months...or year, I can't remember so well.

If I like something I shouldn't like, should I stick to it, or leave that thing alone for the better? ....Who knows. I just know I'll regret the choice whatever happens.

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."

Lao Tzu

If that is true, then how different my life would be right now.

Now I'll answer two more '50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind' seeming as I missed one out on the last post, and it's been a while since I've done anything.

7) Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

Thats such an easy answer for me. I'm settling for what I'm doing lately. It's bad, because what I believe in is something that spans so far away from my actions at this time. I have a love/hate relationship with my own feelings, and it's really not helping me in any way. I will tell myself I'll do something amazing, then when it gets round to it, I'll back down and leave it for another day. This I guess, is the cycle of 99% of human lives. There are only a miniscule amount of people on this planet who really fight for what the believe in. It's hard to think about that, but if you can't face the truth, then you are already a slave to sin.

8) If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

I would have told someone something by now if that was the case. I wouldn't take so much for granted. I always think about things like 'What if this is the last time I walk into this house?' or 'What if this is my last meal?' and if the average life span was 40 years, that could be the case. Who knows what would really happen. The whole world could be in chaos, or it could be a wonderful place. I really don't know, but it pains me to think about it for certain reasons.